Solitude Staycation

When was the last time you’ve experienced sacred solitude for 24 hours?

I’m talking no real agenda. No task list. Just focused, undistracted time to embrace silence and solitude. If you’re a mom, chances are it’s been a while. Most likely it was some time before your children were born. You love your family, and also realize that some extended time of quiet by yourself could do wonders to clear your mind and restore your soul. That’s exactly where I was at, and recently after taking a solitude staycation, I decided to write a post to help provide inspiration for other women and mothers to invest in this time of sacred solitude.

My Journey with Solitude

In 2020 during quarantine, I as many of us did, faced the crossroad between isolation and solitude. It all came into focus while I was walking through COVID and missing the embrace of my husband and children. I wanted to find a way to make the most of the time and not waste it. One day, I came across a sermon on the power of solitude by DawnChere Wilkerson that really helped to shift my perspective about the value of prioritizing intentional time alone (both routinely during your week and for an extended time) to pray and receive clarity and focus.

In his best-selling book, Emotionally Healthy Spirituality, Peter Scazzero says this:

“Dallas Willard called silence and solitude the two most radical disciplines of the Christian life. Solitude is the practice of being absent from people and things to attend to God. Silence is the practice of quieting every inner and outer voice to attend to God.” (page 148)

As a mom, I have quiet time in prayer and alone time after the kids have gone to bed, but solitude was something more intentional and sacred I wanted to build a better habit in doing.

At the beginning of this summer, I started feeling drawn to take some extended time in solitude. I envisioned an overnight stay at a hotel in the city, with time to pause from my normal routine and listen intently to what God wants to say over my life.

I posted a questionnaire on my Instastory and to my surprise, I wasn’t the only one who wished to take a solitude trip but hadn’t done it yet. After speaking with a friend who’s done several solitude trips locally and out of state, she encouraged me to start local. I began looking into some places around town, and decided on a hotel that has beautiful, historic architecture and great brunch. Once my birthday month came around, I knew this would be a great time to go for it! I coined the phrase “solitude staycation” and named this time according to what was on my heart to do.

What is a Solitude Staycation?

A solitude staycation is a time to get away, unplug and embrace the silence of solitude in order to listen to what God has to say. It’s a time to reflect, be refreshed, and be restored. For me, a solitude staycation isn’t about catching up on your favorite shows or movies. (Confession: I tried to watch one of my favorite shows on Magnolia Network but it just didn’t feel appropriate. I needed media silenced just for this 24hr period.) A solitude staycation is about allowing your mind and heart to be clear from external voices and distractions so you can allow the abundance of your heart to come to the surface and faced with the Lord in prayer.

My Experience + Takeaways

The purpose of today’s post is to give you inspiration to embrace solitude and create plans to experience your very own solitude staycation. I’ve included a sample itinerary, Spotify playlist, hotel app to make your process smooth, and some great solitude teaching resources. After reading this post, I hope that you’ll give it a try as well!

My Solitude Staycation Schedule:

8:00am - Started at the gym (went to the sauna…nothing strenuous)

9:00am - Took time to journal and enjoy an iced oat milk pistachio latte at a local coffee shop

10:00am - Spa treatment (Ladies, if you’re in Tulsa, I highly recommend Tulsa Poppi for a massage and lounge pass to experience the color pod and salt room. This was gifted to me by a friend for my birthday, and was a highlight of my day!)

12:00pm - Healthy Lunch & Reading Time at Inheritance Juicery (I opted for a healthy, pure food lunch to fuel my day)

1:15pm - Pedicure (In hindsight, I would have waited on the pedicure for another day to have extended time at lunch to read and rest.)

3:00pm - Check in at The Hotel

I packed light, including lounge clothes, a few books on emotional health and soul care, and of course my bible and notepad. I ended up not reading the books much, and spent more time just listening to the quiet and waiting to hear God speak. I had a few questions that I wrote down and was seeking direction from the Lord on, and took some time to be prayerful in that direction of listening.

6:00pm - Dinner time!

Instead of room service, I opted to order takeout from one of my favorite meals downtown, La Tertulia’s rainbow trout. It’s so good, y’all. The chimichurri and new potatoes…the sopapillas as a side. Sooo good.

It’s not everyday that mama eats dinner in bed, so that was fun! (After eating, I did take my food container to the trash nearby so my room wouldn’t smell like fish and kill the vibe. Haha)

7:00pm -10:00pm - Evening Hours

I brought a face mask to enjoy a DIY facial, and just enjoyed time to rest and listen to my new favorite album, In Full Bloom by Sharyn!

I tried to pull up a show on my iPad from Magnolia network, but after one episode I realized that wasn’t what I needed. So I did some note taking and journaling before going to sleep.

Next Day - Morning Hours

The sunset was so beautiful cascading over the church nearby that I watched through my window. More time to rest and chill and read the Word.

8:30am - Brunch! The hotel I stayed at had a fantastic brunch that my family and I have enjoyed frequenting for years now. As you can see, it didn’t disappoint!

9:30am Exploring the hotel and enjoying time alone with my husband

1:00pm - Checkout!

Tips for planning your Solitude Staycation

Where to stay - Hotel Tips

When it comes to selecting a hotel, do your best to be intentional about selecting the detail of where your room will be located. This was important to me because I wanted to experience ample natural light and be somewhere quiet. I used the Hilton Honors app to check in online, select the best corner room option that was exactly what I’d seen online, and get a digital key for my door. I also called the front desk to make sure I was getting the best view from my room once I got down to two options. That being said, I recommend to call ahead and ask for a room that will have the best view and natural window light that doesn’t face a parking garage or anything.

Also! If you can, request a late checkout and breakfast included. This was a huge blessing to extend my time and not feel rushed in the morning, and my husband was able to meet me at the hotel for brunch and a day date!

What to do

I can almost hear you asking, “Okay, but like, what do you actually do?” Here’s what I'd advise, don’t schedule yourself too much. Take some time to enjoy your favorite things like coffee or a mani/pedi and then once you get to the hotel, plan to really rest and embrace the quiet.

Pray + Listen

Silence the noise of social media and screen time and just sit for a little while. That may seem uncomfortable at first, but it’s important to give your mind time to reset without competing voices. Get comfortable, rest in bed, take a shower, whatever makes you feel refreshed. And then bring out your bible and notepad or a book and listen with an expectation to hear from God.

Rest

As in, lay in the bed. Take a nap. (Novel, I know!) SLEEP! Relieve yourself from the pressure of having to do anything and just be.

What to Listen To: A Spotify Playlist

I curated this playlist based on music that I listened to while I was at the hotel, as well as songs that I have enjoyed in solitude at home recently. (Can I just say that our girl Sharyn from the UK is my new fav?! I absolutely love her sound and vibe mixed with lyrics that celebrate Jesus and a passion for Him. I’m so grateful I came across her single on iTunes. And Taya’s self titled album? Don’t even get me started. Getaway? All Eyes on You?! I can’t even. So many tears. I’m so grateful for music that draws towards peace in His presence.

As you curate your own playlist, think of songs that evoke stillness, alignment with Jesus, peace and reflection on who He is. I’d recommend a mix of worship and LoFi, just to get some space to have your own words come to mind as the music plays.

Solitude Resources:

I understand that not everyone can plan for a 24 hour solitude staycation at this time, and so I wanted to present some resource to enhance your daily times of solitude in whatever capacity you can experience at this time.

ONE MINUTE Pause App

This app by John Eldredge has been a daily resource that I often recommend to help build a routine of prayer, pause and release of your day. The 30 Days to Resilience plan is a great place to start.

Sermon resources

The Power of Solitude by DawnChere Wilkerson

The power of solitude by Charles Stanley (audio)

Cultivating Sacred Solitude podcast episode by John and Lisa Bevere

If you’ve made it this far, giiiiirl you’re a rider. Thanks for hanging with me and reading all these details. I took the time to really beef this post up in hopes that this blog post is a source of encouragement and inspiration to experience your very own solitude staycation.

If you have any questions, or tips to add, let me know in the comments and I’d love to continue the conversation.

Cheering you on, mama. I believe in you, young lady.

Emonne Markland

The Opportunity of Empty

Many of us have heard the analogy of varying perspectives of a partially-filled glass of water. One would ask a group of people or audience, “What do you see? Some would respond, “A glass half empty.” Others respond with “a glass half full.”

Today, I want to share with you from this example of a glass and give you the opportunity to take personal assessment of where you are in this season and discover the opportunity within areas of emptiness. First, l’d like to share a personal story from experience of emptiness.

I remember being a new mom to my daughter Grace and feeling completely overwhelmed. I was twenty five years old, newly married for only 2 years, the first of my friends to have a baby, and living in a one bedroom apartment with a baby who didn’t want to nurse. Sitting at my pump on the edge of my couch, I felt completely weak. Like, in over my head…I don’t think I’m fit to be a mom weak! Yet in my moment of weakness I heard God say to my heart, “You can be weak. Let me be strong.” His words gave me permission to release my desire to be strong on my own and have everything figured out. I could rest the weight of my trust on who He is, and allow my weakness to be the empty space that He could fill with His strength. I wrote His words down on a sticky note and placed the note in my pump as a reminder, as well as mediated on this Scripture:

And He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. (2 Corinthians 12:9 NKJV)

Sometimes, when we are navigating seasons of loss or constantly pouring out, we become so focused on our inadequacy or what no longer remains that we neglect to remember there is a Source that can sustain us in every area. Or maybe your time or attention is so filled with activity that your soul is desperately missing the fullness available in the presence of God through fellowship with Him.

For you, it may be a new job that’s stretching you to the max or a place in your life that was once full and vibrant that now seems empty and stagnant.

Notably, there is another concerning thought pattern for consideration: the deception that past seasons of fullness have translated into today without realizing that you are needing a continual connection to the source of your strength and fulfillment.

I’m here to remind you today that the very place where you feel empty, depleted or dry is a place where God can fill you to the overflow. People and things cannot sustain the empty places of your soul. But Jesus can and will! Be encouraged and receive the fullness of who He is. Don’t let condemnation hold you back from asking. He wants to fill you up.

“Empty is an opportunity to be filled.”

Recently, I heard the voice of the Holy Spirit speak these words to my heart during a staff conference at my church, and have been meditating on these words several times since, as biblical examples of this truth have been illuminated in my heart.

For the woman with the issue of blood, the end of her resources was the beginning of her faith switching from physicians and into the power that flowed from the only One who could heal her.

“Now a certain woman had a flow of blood for twelve years, and had suffered many things from many physicians. She had spent all that she had and was no better, but rather grew worse. When she heard about Jesus, she came behind Him in the crowd and touched His garment. For she said, “If only I may touch His clothes, I shall be made well.” Immediately the fountain of her blood was dried up, and she felt in her body that she was healed of the affliction. And Jesus, immediately knowing in Himself that power had gone out of Him, turned around in the crowd and said, “Who touched My clothes?” But His disciples said to Him, “You see the multitude thronging You, and You say, ‘Who touched Me?’ ”

And He looked around to see her who had done this thing. But the woman, fearing and trembling, knowing what had happened to her, came and fell down before Him and told Him the whole truth. And He said to her, “Daughter, your faith has made you well. Go in peace, and be healed of your affliction.” (Mark 5:25-34 NKJV)

For the widow down to nothing but a jar of oil, empty vessels from neighbors were the place that the oil continued to flow until there were no vessels remaining. 

A certain woman of the wives of the sons of the prophets cried out to Elisha, saying, “Your servant my husband is dead, and you know that your servant feared the Lord. And the creditor is coming to take my two sons to be his slaves.” So Elisha said to her, “What shall I do for you? Tell me, what do you have in the house?” And she said, “Your maidservant has nothing in the house but a jar of oil.” Then he said, “Go, borrow vessels from everywhere, from all your neighbors—empty vessels; do not gather just a few.  And when you have come in, you shall shut the door behind you and your sons; then pour it into all those vessels, and set aside the full ones.” So she went from him and shut the door behind her and her sons, who brought the vessels to her; and she poured it out. Now it came to pass, when the vessels were full, that she said to her son, “Bring me another vessel.”

And he said to her, “There  is not another vessel.” So the oil ceased. Then she came and told the man of God. And he said, “Go, sell the oil and pay your debt; and you and your sons live on the rest.” (2 Kings 4:1-7 NKJV)

In my own life, no longer feeling weak as a new, nursuing mother yet navigating days of continuous pouring I am reminded of this truth:

I am a limited resource. God is an unlimited resource.

His power and love are accessible to draw from at all times.

In other words, empty is an opportunity to be filled with His strength.

I’ve heard it said that when you’re down to nothing, God is up to something. My prayer for you today is that you receive a paradigm shift from depletion to expectation that empty is an opportunity to be filled.

Prayer: Jesus, I’ve felt empty lately. I repent for seeking other sources to fill the voids of my heart and soul. Holy Spirit, I ask that You fill me up. I ask for a fresh revelation of who you are, and a renewed desire for You. Matthew 5:6, you promised that blessed are those who hunger and thirst after righteousness, for they shall be filled. I ask for a hunger and thirst for your righteousness, and a distaste for the things of this world. Fill me to the overflow from the unlimited resource of your power and love. I receive it now. In Jesus’s Name, Amen.

Emonne

Winter Changes Into Spring

“The season has changed, the bondage of your barren winter has ended, and the season of hiding is over and gone. The rains have soaked the earth and left it bright with blossoming flowers. The season for singing and pruning the vines has arrived. I hear the cooing of doves in our land, filling the air with songs to awaken you and guide you forth. Can you not discern this new day of destiny breaking forth around you? The early signs of my purposes and plans are bursting forth. The budding vines of new life are now blooming everywhere. The fragrance of their flowers whispers, “There is change in the air.” Arise, my love, my beautiful companion, and run with me to the higher place. For now is the time to arise and come away with me.” (Song of Songs‬ ‭2:11-13‬ ‭TPT‬‬)

Winters in Spring
Have you ever felt like you’re in a perpetual winter? I live in Tulsa, Oklahoma and let me tell you, the winters here can be quite long. There are hopeful days when it seems like the weather is changing and then boom! You look at the weather app only to see temperatures will drop to freezing the next day. It seems that wintery weather forecasts well into March and April. I understand that some people love the cold, while others enjoy the Springtime weather. Can you guess which one of those people I am? :)

It’s one thing when winter remains on the weather forecast too long, but it’s another when winter is your life season. Cold days and nights that feel unending as challenges and tests seem to pile up one on top of the other. I remember feeling this was in April 2007. I had just found out that I needed a major lung surgery and went through other health attacks on top of that. My mom said it was like blow after blow from every direction. I wondered why I was going through this, especially after I had recently turned my life around and was seeking God wholeheartedly. Have you ever been seeking God and it seemed like the attacks were greater than before? That was how I felt too. April 2007 felt like winter in Springtime.

Seasons Change
After walking through lung surgery to remove the malignant mass, I began to feel the season change. Although I was home recovering from surgery and regaining my ability to walk, talk, eat and drink, something new was springing forth. Little did I know that within just a few months, God would sent His love into my life by way of a special young man named Stephan Markland. I could have never seen it coming, yet His goodness began to overtake my life just as abruptly as the previous challenges. I went from being in the hospital in April 2007 to being engaged in June of that same year and then married by April 2009.

Song of Solomon 2:11-13 was our wedding scripture passage and is so rich with beauty, promises and change. Spring is my favorite season for so many reasons. Primarily because I’ve seen God turn my Winter of health challenges into Spring. April went from being a month of my greatest battle to the month of celebrating my greatest joys. Although my surgery was in April, I celebrated my wedding in April 2009, my daughter Grace born in April 2011, and there have been so many blessings released in the month of April. Our family even moved to Tulsa in April 2019!

Believe for your Spring

We serve a God who specializes in restoration. Who turns our mourning into dancing and our sorrow into joy. Who gives us beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, and a garment of praise for a spirit of heaviness. I look back with gratutide and forward with expectation every year around this time. This year, on April 17th, I will celebrate 15 years cancer free.

I’m sure we all have a day or month on the calendar that reflects a winter moment or season of great pain and loss. I want to encourage you that God is able to bring not only healing but restoration in that same place on the calendar. I’m believing that for you today. Winter won’t last a lifetime.

#iRunWithMaud - Painful & Puzzling

Today I took my kids for a walk/run and couldn’t bring myself to explain to them why. We’ve been going on walks more than ever the last few weeks, but today was for a different purpose. They smiled and ran, as I kept a close eye on them while trekking along. So much joy and innocence as Josiah ran with his arms high in the air. Grace being protective big sister as usual. All the while, my mind was unable to comprehend the pain of Ahmaud’s mother who watched her children run and play and is now grieving her son’s unjust murder. Today, on what would have been his 26th birthday, I joined with thousands of others around the world and walked in his memory.

As a daughter of God, as a black woman, as a woman who was raised by, am married to and am raising a black man, I view this racial injustice from many vantage points. From every angle, it is painful and puzzling. 

As someone who was raised in multiethnic schools and churches my whole life, I absolutely love the diversity of my friendships and community. It is a personal value I will always uphold. Yet, I realize that in this country there’s a deep rooted ignorance, fear and hatred against people of color that needs to be uprooted and healed from the heart.  

As a black woman, I know that God created me with this skin color for a purpose. I’m grateful for who I am, and the strength of my racial heritage. Yet even though I’ve personally experienced racism and witnessed it with my husband and family, it always puzzles me. I don’t expect it, because I don’t operate that way. I don’t live my life focused on “he’s white” and “I’m black.” I acknowledge and celebrate the differences, sure, but it’s not the blaring sounding board that I base my life and decisions by everyday. Yet here we are again, another innocent life taken unjustly, and I’m grappling between the pain and the puzzling. 

The pain and the puzzling. 

The pain and the puzzling. 

That’s the simplest way I can describe it. 

The pain in light of his family, the puzzling of a father and son conspiring against an innocent young man. The pain of lost dreams, the puzzling of what could have been. The pain of being reminded again of the sweltering, ignorant hatred that exists against people that look like me and my family...the puzzling nature of outright injustice. 

With all of my questions, pain and puzzling thoughts, I know that I serve a God of justice. While on my walk today, I listened to a bible reading plan that included Psalm 58. It spoke of injustice, and how the people of God celebrate when justice is served. I pray that justice is served, and upheld consistently. I pray that the next generation can end racism. I pray that my generation will break out of the comfort zones of one-race friend groups and embrace meaningful relationships and uncomfortable conversations with people of a different race. I pray that the love of God would be shown abroad and truly win over hate. 

I never do posts like this, because there are just so many layers and deep thoughts that I process through regarding this issue, but today, I decided to speak. Thanks for listening.

Emonne Markland

How to Handle Disappointment

Amidst the outbreak of coronavirus, it seems that cancellations are at an all time high. From major sporting event cancelations and school closings to travel and remote work changes, there have been unprecedented decisions made as a precaution for the health and safety of everyone. Even the hashtag #canceleverything went viral earlier this week. While there’s been a prevailing sense of fear and panic that many have expressed and provided encouragement for, I believe there’s another underlying issue to address as well: disappointment. 

This afternoon, I saw post after post expressing disappointment from unexpected cancellations that led me to reflect and write this post.

What do you do when the thing you’ve been preparing for and looking forward to has been cancelled?

The family vacation you saved up for: cancelled. 

The missions trip you know God called you to go on: cancelled. 

The major work event you’ve been planning for months and even YEARS: cancelled. 

The tournament you’ve practiced and prepared your whole life for: cancelled. 

Disappointment can be a silent thief of your joy and peace. The unexpected change of plans can feel like an unexpected blow to the heart. 

I remember raising money for a missions trip back in 2007, only to find out I had to cancel my trip due to the unexpected illness of lung cancer. As I mailed all my donors to notify them of my cancellation and watched my friends missions pictures popping up on Facebook, I was discouraged and disappointed. Spending that summer at home recovering from major surgery was not what I had in mind.
But little did I know, that would be the greatest summer of turnaround in my life. I wasn’t on the mission field as I’d hoped, but I grew a lot in my faith and was in position for an unexpected blessing. (If you want more details, check this YouTube video of my story, Real Love) 

Fast forward to the last few months, disappointment struck again. Our week-long trip to visit family in Texas for Christmas break that we’d looked forward to for months: cancelled due to the flu. My & Grace’s first mother daughter trip to Michigan for my grandma’s 90th birthday: cancelled due to coronavirus precautions. I share these moments not to be a downer, but to say that I understand firsthand the unique challenge of disappointment and wanted to share some words of encouragement that have helped me along the way. 

Here are 4 keys to handling disappointment:

1. Grieve what you had in mind 

Unrealized expectation can be painful, and it’s important to grieve the loss of what you had in mind. Don’t suppress or seek to escape your emotions. Allow yourself to feel, take it to God, confess your hurts to a trusted friend or leader, and lay it down. This isn’t the outcome you were expecting, but it’s only the end if you allow it to be. 

2. Realize that preparation is never wasted time 

All the time, prayer and preparation you put in is not wasted! You’ve grown and developed in so many ways that you wouldn’t have otherwise. This will make your next trip or your next experience even better because you’ve exercised your muscle along the way. It’s worth saying again: Preparation is never wasted time. 

3. Don’t lose hope 

Sure, this moment makes everything in you want to not even try again. But don’t lose hopeful expectation. Believe that something good is coming, even better than the thing you were looking forward to. “When hope’s dream seems to drag on and on, the delay can be depressing. But when at last your dream comes true, life’s sweetness will satisfy your soul.” Proverbs 13:12

4. Find purpose & opportunity in the redirection 

So, you’re not where you hoped to be right now. But what is the opportunity available now that you’re here? Who can you reach where you are? What can you do to make a difference? Remain open to God’s will exactly where you are and ask Him to order your steps to be a blessing to someone. There may be people here who need your encouragement and wouldn’t have received it if you were where you’d hoped to be. “You can make many plans, but the Lord’s purpose will prevail.” (Prov.‬ ‭19:21‬ ‭NLT‬‬)

I hope that this post provides encouragement today for those experiencing disappointment in this season of uncertainty and change. Use wisdom, stay informed and be encouraged. In the midst of every unexpected challenge, is a unique opportunity. 

And while we’re at it, let’s tell fear and discouragement: you’re cancelled.

Emonne Markland

My Grandmother’s Childhood Christmas Story

One Christmas Eve, my grandmother and her brother were determined to find the hiding place for their Christmas gifts. They searched high and low, in the smokehouse and all throughout the family farm to try to find their presents. Despite all of their searching, they couldn’t find a single present. Their excitement turned to disappointment. They figured that there would be no Christmas gifts this year, and went to bed that night discouraged, dreading waking up the next morning.

The next day, on Christmas morning, their parents came and woke them up, and called them into the family room. They reluctantly arose with little expectation of anything special. To their utter surprise, it was the biggest Christmas they ever had. There were toys for everyone! The stockings that once appeared limp and empty were filled with apples, oranges and nuts. There was more than they even hoped for.

This morning, when my grandmother shared her childhood Christmas memory with me, I imagined her & her brother searching for the toys, disappointed faces lying in bed on Christmas Eve, and their bright eyes of wonder on Christmas morning.

Her memory encouraged me in my current season, and I believe it will do the same for you.

I was reminded of the song lyrics from Waymaker:

“Even when I don’t see it, You’re working. Even when I don’t feel it, You’re working.”

Just like my grandmother’s parents were working on a surprise for their children even when the evidence appeared bleak, God is working on blessings in the background. We can’t always see it, but we have to trust & believe the Father’s heart. The Bible says, “It’s the glory of God to conceal a matter, But the glory of kings is to search out a matter.” (Proverbs 25:2) God specializes in hiding great gifts in unlikely places.

So if you’re believing for something you haven’t yet seen, and feel disappointment in your seemingly empty search, trust that God is still at work. Begin to expect again. Hope again. Have faith for what you cannot yet see.

There are hidden, stored up blessings that will be revealed in due time.

Emonne Markland

Leave Your Beauty Mark

Madewell at Magnolia Table : Denim on Denim

Hello! 

It’s been a while since I’ve shared an outfit post and I thought this outfit story would be a fun way to get back in the game. 

This week, one of my closest friends of over 15 years came to town for a 48-hour thrill ride of fun with her two children. We decided to pack up the minivan rental and head to Waco, TX for a quick road trip to Magnolia. Our destination would begin with breakfast at Magnolia Table in the morning, and Magnolia Market food trucks for lunch. 

With such a fun occasion on the horizon, I wanted to wear an outfit that was appropriate for where we were going for the day and still reflective of my unique style.  

So, you may be wondering: What do you wear to Magnolia Market and Magnolia Table?

For me, when considering the outdoors and beautiful aesthetics of Magnolia, I wanted to keep it simple, comfortable and yet stylish. The weather forecast was great at a high of 60 degrees, so I knew I didn’t have to wear a heavy sweater or coat and could bank on layers.

After getting my kids dressed and ready in jeans and long sleeve black t-shirts , I opted for a similar look: denim on denim with a tan leather tote bag & leopard boat shoes.

Great for outdoors. Simple yet fun. Relaxed and comfortable.

So let’s talk denim details....

You can never go wrong with denim on denim in an outdoor setting. I’ve had this denim jacket from J.Crew Outlet for several years and I knew it would be a staple in my wardrobe. It was actually a gift from my husband on one of our anniversaries! 

Now, with these jeans.

Y’all.

I’m new to the Madewell denim train. I’ve had the Madewell transporter tote for several years but always thought the jeans were too pricey. A few months ago, I got an email about a 40% the sale special and decided to go in and try on a few jeans. Well...after trying on the Madewell 9-inch high rise skinny jeans & the 10-inch high rise skinny jeans I must say the 10 was the most flattering pair of jeans I’ve ever tried on. They fit perfectly at the waist and stay in place. They also claim to have “miracle pockets” that suck everything in (no more mama pooch!) and hey, it worked for me y’all. 

Shoe for the day

I’ve had these leopard Sperry’s boat shoes since Grace was like 1! They are a great alternative for regular gym shoes when you have a long day outdoors. They’ve stood the test of time in comfort, quality and style. One of my all-time favorite casual shoes! They don’t sell this material anymore but I’ve seen a pair on Poshmark. 

We had the most wonderful morning at Magnolia Table enjoying their fabulous breakfast (get the French toast breakfast & a lavender latte. Trust me!!) and great afternoon at the silos. Magnolia Market is such a beautiful place to enjoy and has a peaceful atmosphere for any age. We met so many people who were visiting from around the country. My friend and I said it’s like adult Disneyworld!! :)

One kind gentleman we met near the #MilesToMagnolia sign was 60, retired and on a multi-state roadtrip with his wife. He complimented us on how beautiful our families are and when I asked him for a piece of advice to young 30 year olds he said this:

   “Enjoy every moment. Have fun!”

 It’s so true. Too often we get caught up in the weight of life’s details and don’t know how to pull away from the hamster wheel and just have fun. I’m glad my friend Alyssa came to town and encouraged me to enjoy the moments at Magnolia with our children playing together and basking in the warmth of the silos. Every bite was sweet and savory. Every moment was special (even the dual diaper changing frenzy at the Silos Bakery Co. bathroom! Haha).  

This weekend, I hope you’ll take some time to step away from your norm and enjoy something new. 

Wholeheartedly,

Emonne Markland 

Overcoming Christmas Loneliness

Have you ever felt alone in a crowded place? I remember one night being unintentionally separated from my family at a downtown Christmas tree lighting. There were hundreds of people everywhere... smiling, taking pictures with the sparkles of Christmas lights shining through their eyes...Merry music rang throughout the streets & sidewalks... while I waited and looked for my husband for what felt like forever. With no battery life in my phone to call him, my heart sank and I began to feel not just lost, but sad. In time, we were reunited...but I never forgot that feeling of being alone & lost in a crowd of merry people.

This holiday season, I believe that every day we encounter people who are not just experiencing a moment of loneliness, but a lifestyle. And no matter what season of life you’re in, we all have something that we’re believing to see change. Many people are lost, and really struggling with dark feelings and circumstances. Maybe you’re feeling that way this holiday season, and this year has sent unexpected blow after blow and you’re just ready for it all to be over. I remember feeling like that in 2018, and even spoke with someone today who is feeling that way as they grieve the loss of several loved ones a few weeks apart. It’s so important to acknowledge that not everyone feels happy this season.

Life is hard, and it’s okay not to feel merry by default this Christmas.

We all experiencing real life, real emotions and real disappointments. My encouragement to you is to take time to process your emotions. Don’t and find something to be thankful for.

If you’re it’s up to us to give our attention, encouragement and kindness to those around us. When we take the time to look up & speak up, we can make a difference in someone’s life. Ultimately, placing hope and trust in Jesus helps to bring light to those dark places.

_

This week, my church is putting on a Christmas production that creates an environment where you can not only experience a spectacular show, but find a place to belong. So if you’re reading this, you’re invited! The shows are Wednesday - Sunday and are FREE for everyone. And if you’re out of state (Hey Texas!) you can host a watch party with your family to view together at home one night! Visit Christmas.victory.com or watch on YouTube. Our family will be attending and serving throughout the week, so let me know when you’re coming.

Most importantly, I want to encourage you: don’t spend the holidays alone. Don’t let those negative thoughts and emotions take over. Take some time to have fun, laugh, be a blessing to someone else, get around positive people and uplifting environments. Interrupt the darkness with light.

Wholeheartedly,

Emonne Markland

Why Spanx Faux Leather Leggings are the Best Leggings Ever + How to Style

As a mom of two active young children (7 year old and 1 year old), I am constantly on the move and need some pants that can move right on with me.

Since my days of pregnancy, I have found leggings to be my go-to for comfort and multi-functional style. From running errands to Friday date night with my husband, leggings are a girl’s best friend!

Style Story: Why I Love Spanx Leggings

When I first tried Spanx leggings a few years ago, I was pleasantly surprised by how flattering they were. The high waist helped secure my stomach in all the right places and the quality of material was like nothing I’ve ever had. They’ve lasted me for several years with no fading, tearing or shrinking in the laundry! They truly are the best leggings I’ve ever had (and I’ve tried a ton!) and absolute must-have, even if you just save up for one pair.

Spanx Faux Leather Leggings are NEXT LEVEL

Now that the Spanx faux leather leggings are on the scene, the game has officially been forever changed.

And by the way, can we take a moment and acknowledge how much of an official GIRL BOSS Sara Blakely is?!!! Seriously though. I absolutely LOVE her story and it’s a joy to follow along the journey via her Instagram. She is totally repsiresenting for all the women out there working hard, raising young children and going after a dream that helps to empower others. Major shoutout!)

So back to these glorious faux leather leggings…

I first tried on the Spanx faux leather moto leggings for fun at Evereve (the ultimate mom store…they even have a kids play area near the fitting rooms!!) and I was shocked. I literally felt like Wonder Woman! Like, immediate hot mama factor. Haha. They were slimming. They were stretchy. They were comfy. They were snatching my waist like it’d never been snatched before. I knew that even though they were pricy, they’d be worth saving up for!

Fast forward to November 2018, I’m walking through Nordrstom Rack to peek and see if they have a pair by chance. I’ve seen Spanx leggings there before so I knew there may be a slight possibility. Well, I kid you not, after going through the checkout line for some tops I found for Josiah, I saw some leather peeking out from a go back rack near the window. After checking out, I went to investigate, and although the leather I first saw wasn’t the Spanx leggings, I looked behind that pair and y’all, these shiny, pebbled faux leather Spanx leggings were hanging pretty. IN MY SIZE and everything. I hurried to the fitting room, slid my way into those pants and boom. It was a done deal. And 60% retail!!! The rest is history.

Ways to Wear Spanx Faux Leather Leggings

Casual

There are SO many ways you can wear these leggings. The most common way I’ve worn them is for casual outings. Throw on a nice pair of gym shoes (or Cole Haan kicks for me), a long top & denim jacket and you’re good to go!

Dressy

This day, I wore them to church and during our family time afterwards. I felt great all day.

Starbucks Reserve coffee run / Basketball Game Night

#Details 😍 - Here’s a closeup on the material! Looks slightly snakeskin. My Nikes are tagged on LIKEtoKnow!

Well, as you can see, my Spanx faux leather leggings have been on HEAVY rotation in my wardrobe the last few months, and with good reason. I just feel great in them! I believe you will too.

Also, I’ve seen this specific pair on sale for 30% off recently! They’d be worth checking out.

So tell me, have you tried Spanx leggings?

If so, what are your thoughts?

Looking forward to hearing from you guys and hope you have a great weekend!

Wholeheartedly,

Emonne Markland

Seasons / Change

Life is full of seasons. Summer just so happens to be my favorite. While several of my friends and family members prefer fall‘s cooler weather, I’m here for the heat. ☀️😍 Give me pool parties, iced lattes, sandals and shorts, white tees and high-waist jeans, sunglasses and orange lipstick. I bask in it all with a bright smile on my face.

But just like we all know, seasons will always inevitably change. Summer heat turns into a cool, fall breeze. Fall winds blow into Winter snowflakes and before you know it, Spring is in the air with its luscious blooms that prepare the way for Summer all over again. 

Seasons of our lives are no different. And that was one of the best pieces of advice Stephan and I received during our premarital counseling. Life (college, singleness, marriage, motherhood, entrepreneurship, etc.) is made up of seasons. And seasons always change. Don’t get stuck in one season and let discouragement cause you to doubt that things will never change. Life ALWAYS changes.

I remember the last time I saw my grandfather before he passed away and I asked him what was the one thing he loved most about life. His answer arrested my heart, “Change.” How profound and true. I’ve pondered on this ever since.

I don’t know what season you’re in right now, but I want to encourage you that it will change. If it’s really great right now and you’re loving the Summer sun of life, make memories and write down a note to your winter season so you can hold onto that joy. If it’s wintery cold in your relationships, workplace, business or even within your heart, look for the beauty in where you are and expect a brighter tomorrow.

“For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven.”

Ecclesiastes 3:1 NLT

“While the earth remains,

Seedtime and harvest,

Cold and heat,

Winter and summer,

And day and night

Shall not cease.”

GENESIS 8:22 AMP

Don’t challenge the change. Embrace the newness to come.  

Emonne

Don't Jump

As sweat drips from his brow, a man peers over the edge of a bridge to the speeding cars below. Wind blows through his hair as his heart beats fast and hard, feeling as if it will beat clear through his shirt. Thoughts of what happened swarm through his mind as the weight of his mistake holds him hostage, frozen in time. I can't take this anymore. I've had enough. I failed and there's no turning back.

He looks to his right and his left, wipes his brow and takes a deep breath of release before he takes his fateful plunge. When all of a sudden...

"DON'T JUMP!!!"

The loud, stern cry of a faraway bystander holds him back. The bystander walks calmly and cautiously in his direction with their hands in the air, reasoning with him to come down and realize that jumping won't solve his problem...

 This is the word that came to Jeremiah from the Lord:  “Go down to the potter’s house, and there I will give you my message.”  So I went down to the potter’s house, and I saw him working at the wheel. But the pot he was shaping from the clay was marred in his hands; so the potter formed it into another pot, shaping it as seemed best to him. Then the word of the Lord came to me.  He said, “Can I not do with you, Israel, as this potter does?” declares the Lord. “Like clay in the hand of the potter, so are you in my hand, Israel (Jeremiah 18:1-6 NIV).

Many of us have been on the Potter's wheel lately. Tossing and turning. Swirling and stretching. Painfully growing through the discomfort and heat of the process. I know it's been tough. The potter's wheel isn't glamorous. It isn't pretty. It's messy and quite confusing. It takes everything in you to stay the course and allow God to shape you and mold you through the trials of life, many of which make no sense to your logical thinking and reasoning. And yet, if we jump and abort the process, we will be left as an unfinished lump of clay, always wondering what could have and would have happened if only we'd stayed the course.

As someone who is right there with you, let me encourage you today. Before you make a drastic move and try to fix the circumstance yourself in an attempt to assist God (because of course, the God who runs the universe needs our help in running our lives), don't jump. Don't jump off the Potter's wheel. God is working in you something far greater and bigger than what your mind can even conceive right now. If you want to be used by Him in a great way, you've got to submit to the process. Looking back over your life, I'm sure that you can recall a time of transition and growth where you thought there was no way you would make it through. And yet, as you stayed the course and allowed the Potter to have His way, you came out of that situation as a better person and are thankful you went through it. The same thing applies to now. God is molding us, shaping us, and preparing us for His work through us. He is forming us into vessels of honor. And in the end, He will be glorified in our lives, sanctified and useful for Him.

But in a great house there are not only vessels of gold and silver, but also of wood and clay, some for honor and some for dishonor.  Therefore if anyone cleanses himself from the latter, he will be a vessel for honor, sanctified and useful for the Master, prepared for every good work (2 Timothy 2:20-21 NIV).

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. (Jeremiah 29:11 NIV)

Emonne Markland

Leave Your Beauty Mark

P.S. For more posts on this topic, check out Vessels and my mom's latest post, Vessels of Honor where she shares 5 keys to becoming a vessel of honor.

Celebrating 10 Years Cancer Free

10 years ago on April 17, 2007,  I went through a major surgery to rid my body of cancer. I was 20 years old and had no idea how sick I was until coughing up blood in my dorm on Easter Sunday. (You can watch my story here.) After my parents traveled to Tulsa to take me back home to Dallas, I underwent one of the most difficult weeks of my life. Prior to the surgery, the enemy threw punch after punch to knock me down. Then the day of my surgery came and I was wheeled into the surgery room. All of the bright hospital lights & shiny silver knives on the table next to me. I asked if I could keep my bible with me on the table and the doctor agreed. 

After the surgery, I woke up to an unquenchable thirst...and quickly realized that I couldn't talk to tell the nurse I needed water. That was rough. She finally came over and gave me some ice cubes. (Thanks a lot. Lol) But that was all I could take. I spent the next few days in the hospital with these massage boots on my legs to keep my circulation flowing. I couldn't walk, talk, eat or drink. They basically shut my body down in order to remove half of my left lung to get rid of the malignant (cancer) mass and all the surrounding lymph nodes. I started practicing walking down the hall arm and arm with my dad a few days later. The nurse said if I could walk down the hall and to the windows and back, then I could go home. With my goal in mind, I practiced and prayed and gathered my strength to make it overtime. Finally, I was discharged and wheeled down to the hospital exit. I'll never forget the sound of the birds singing outside as my dad pulled up his SUV to take me home. I cry just thinking about that.... 

“God has a way of turning our place of pain into our place of rejoicing.”

— Emonne Markland

April has a special place in my heart. As does Easter. It was in this month that I suffered and recovered a disease that kills lives everyday. For whatever reason, God drew a bloodline around me and wouldn't let me die at 20. Then fast forward two years later, April 2009, I got married to the love of my life. Someone I didn't even deserve. Who had prayed for me and believed for my healing when I overlooked him for years. Fast forward to April 2011, Easter Sunday, I was in labor with my baby girl and gave birth on the following day, April 25. And now here I am, April 17, 2017, 30 years old and pregnant with my baby boy.

God has a way of turning our place of pain into our place of rejoicing. I pray that my story brings you encouragement to believe that the same hand that allows pain and suffering is faithful to bring joy and healing. IN THE SAME PLACE!

To God be the glory for reminding me yet again that He is the Resurrection and the Life. He will always give us beauty for ashes. The oil of joy for morning. And the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness. The same God that did it for me, will do it for you.

Emonne Markland

Leave Your Beauty Mark