When was the last time you’ve experienced sacred solitude for 24 hours?
I’m talking no real agenda. No task list. Just focused, undistracted time to embrace silence and solitude. If you’re a mom, chances are it’s been a while. Most likely it was some time before your children were born. You love your family, and also realize that some extended time of quiet by yourself could do wonders to clear your mind and restore your soul. That’s exactly where I was at, and recently after taking a solitude staycation, I decided to write a post to help provide inspiration for other women and mothers to invest in this time of sacred solitude.
My Journey with Solitude
In 2020 during quarantine, I as many of us did, faced the crossroad between isolation and solitude. It all came into focus while I was walking through COVID and missing the embrace of my husband and children. I wanted to find a way to make the most of the time and not waste it. One day, I came across a sermon on the power of solitude by DawnChere Wilkerson that really helped to shift my perspective about the value of prioritizing intentional time alone (both routinely during your week and for an extended time) to pray and receive clarity and focus.
In his best-selling book, Emotionally Healthy Spirituality, Peter Scazzero says this:
“Dallas Willard called silence and solitude the two most radical disciplines of the Christian life. Solitude is the practice of being absent from people and things to attend to God. Silence is the practice of quieting every inner and outer voice to attend to God.” (page 148)
As a mom, I have quiet time in prayer and alone time after the kids have gone to bed, but solitude was something more intentional and sacred I wanted to build a better habit in doing.
At the beginning of this summer, I started feeling drawn to take some extended time in solitude. I envisioned an overnight stay at a hotel in the city, with time to pause from my normal routine and listen intently to what God wants to say over my life.
I posted a questionnaire on my Instastory and to my surprise, I wasn’t the only one who wished to take a solitude trip but hadn’t done it yet. After speaking with a friend who’s done several solitude trips locally and out of state, she encouraged me to start local. I began looking into some places around town, and decided on a hotel that has beautiful, historic architecture and great brunch. Once my birthday month came around, I knew this would be a great time to go for it! I coined the phrase “solitude staycation” and named this time according to what was on my heart to do.
What is a Solitude Staycation?
A solitude staycation is a time to get away, unplug and embrace the silence of solitude in order to listen to what God has to say. It’s a time to reflect, be refreshed, and be restored. For me, a solitude staycation isn’t about catching up on your favorite shows or movies. (Confession: I tried to watch one of my favorite shows on Magnolia Network but it just didn’t feel appropriate. I needed media silenced just for this 24hr period.) A solitude staycation is about allowing your mind and heart to be clear from external voices and distractions so you can allow the abundance of your heart to come to the surface and faced with the Lord in prayer.
My Experience + Takeaways
The purpose of today’s post is to give you inspiration to embrace solitude and create plans to experience your very own solitude staycation. I’ve included a sample itinerary, Spotify playlist, hotel app to make your process smooth, and some great solitude teaching resources. After reading this post, I hope that you’ll give it a try as well!
My Solitude Staycation Schedule:
8:00am - Started at the gym (went to the sauna…nothing strenuous)
9:00am - Took time to journal and enjoy an iced oat milk pistachio latte at a local coffee shop
10:00am - Spa treatment (Ladies, if you’re in Tulsa, I highly recommend Tulsa Poppi for a massage and lounge pass to experience the color pod and salt room. This was gifted to me by a friend for my birthday, and was a highlight of my day!)
12:00pm - Healthy Lunch & Reading Time at Inheritance Juicery (I opted for a healthy, pure food lunch to fuel my day)
1:15pm - Pedicure (In hindsight, I would have waited on the pedicure for another day to have extended time at lunch to read and rest.)
3:00pm - Check in at The Hotel
I packed light, including lounge clothes, a few books on emotional health and soul care, and of course my bible and notepad. I ended up not reading the books much, and spent more time just listening to the quiet and waiting to hear God speak. I had a few questions that I wrote down and was seeking direction from the Lord on, and took some time to be prayerful in that direction of listening.
6:00pm - Dinner time!
Instead of room service, I opted to order takeout from one of my favorite meals downtown, La Tertulia’s rainbow trout. It’s so good, y’all. The chimichurri and new potatoes…the sopapillas as a side. Sooo good.
It’s not everyday that mama eats dinner in bed, so that was fun! (After eating, I did take my food container to the trash nearby so my room wouldn’t smell like fish and kill the vibe. Haha)
7:00pm -10:00pm - Evening Hours
I brought a face mask to enjoy a DIY facial, and just enjoyed time to rest and listen to my new favorite album, In Full Bloom by Sharyn!
I tried to pull up a show on my iPad from Magnolia network, but after one episode I realized that wasn’t what I needed. So I did some note taking and journaling before going to sleep.
Next Day - Morning Hours
The sunset was so beautiful cascading over the church nearby that I watched through my window. More time to rest and chill and read the Word.
8:30am - Brunch! The hotel I stayed at had a fantastic brunch that my family and I have enjoyed frequenting for years now. As you can see, it didn’t disappoint!
9:30am Exploring the hotel and enjoying time alone with my husband
1:00pm - Checkout!
Tips for planning your Solitude Staycation
Where to stay - Hotel Tips
When it comes to selecting a hotel, do your best to be intentional about selecting the detail of where your room will be located. This was important to me because I wanted to experience ample natural light and be somewhere quiet. I used the Hilton Honors app to check in online, select the best corner room option that was exactly what I’d seen online, and get a digital key for my door. I also called the front desk to make sure I was getting the best view from my room once I got down to two options. That being said, I recommend to call ahead and ask for a room that will have the best view and natural window light that doesn’t face a parking garage or anything.
Also! If you can, request a late checkout and breakfast included. This was a huge blessing to extend my time and not feel rushed in the morning, and my husband was able to meet me at the hotel for brunch and a day date!
What to do
I can almost hear you asking, “Okay, but like, what do you actually do?” Here’s what I'd advise, don’t schedule yourself too much. Take some time to enjoy your favorite things like coffee or a mani/pedi and then once you get to the hotel, plan to really rest and embrace the quiet.
Pray + Listen
Silence the noise of social media and screen time and just sit for a little while. That may seem uncomfortable at first, but it’s important to give your mind time to reset without competing voices. Get comfortable, rest in bed, take a shower, whatever makes you feel refreshed. And then bring out your bible and notepad or a book and listen with an expectation to hear from God.
Rest
As in, lay in the bed. Take a nap. (Novel, I know!) SLEEP! Relieve yourself from the pressure of having to do anything and just be.
What to Listen To: A Spotify Playlist
I curated this playlist based on music that I listened to while I was at the hotel, as well as songs that I have enjoyed in solitude at home recently. (Can I just say that our girl Sharyn from the UK is my new fav?! I absolutely love her sound and vibe mixed with lyrics that celebrate Jesus and a passion for Him. I’m so grateful I came across her single on iTunes. And Taya’s self titled album? Don’t even get me started. Getaway? All Eyes on You?! I can’t even. So many tears. I’m so grateful for music that draws towards peace in His presence.
As you curate your own playlist, think of songs that evoke stillness, alignment with Jesus, peace and reflection on who He is. I’d recommend a mix of worship and LoFi, just to get some space to have your own words come to mind as the music plays.
Solitude Resources:
I understand that not everyone can plan for a 24 hour solitude staycation at this time, and so I wanted to present some resource to enhance your daily times of solitude in whatever capacity you can experience at this time.
ONE MINUTE Pause App
This app by John Eldredge has been a daily resource that I often recommend to help build a routine of prayer, pause and release of your day. The 30 Days to Resilience plan is a great place to start.
Sermon resources
The Power of Solitude by DawnChere Wilkerson
The power of solitude by Charles Stanley (audio)
Cultivating Sacred Solitude podcast episode by John and Lisa Bevere
If you’ve made it this far, giiiiirl you’re a rider. Thanks for hanging with me and reading all these details. I took the time to really beef this post up in hopes that this blog post is a source of encouragement and inspiration to experience your very own solitude staycation.
If you have any questions, or tips to add, let me know in the comments and I’d love to continue the conversation.
Cheering you on, mama. I believe in you, young lady.
Emonne Markland
